On November 7th, I attended my first ever book release party for a book called Spin the Sky by Jill MacKenzie. It took place in this tiny little coffee shop in my town, and a lot of people ended up showing up. I don't know what I expected, considering I had never been to a book release party before, but somehow this met all of my expectations. There was wine, beer, and food available for guests, and even books from the author to be purchased for signing. Being my first ever book release party, I convinced my mom to buy me the book, and afterwords, I got it signed by Jill herself. I even got the honor of being introduced to Jill by my teacher, who was good friends with her.
My creative writing teacher was there, along with some students from my creative writing class. My teacher introduced me as a now-published poet (because of my publication in Kaleo Journal) to actual published poets and authors from all over the area. I was so nervous, especially because of my anxiety, but overall, I was honored. She bragged about me to everyone there, telling them I was one of her top students in the class, and even talked about my recent publication and how happy she was for me. The whole thing was like something you'd see in a movie, and part of it felt that way too -- almost unreal, in a way, like you weren't really there. Everyone was standing, drinking, and talking for the most part, and 2 out of the 3 I don't do. So you could see how I was kind of forced out of my comfort zone a bit. Despite this, however, I really enjoyed the event. Talking to other published poets and writers made me feel like I belonged there somehow, and seeing other people from my class made me feel more comfortable being there. I have yet to start reading Jill's book, Spin the Sky, but from what I've heard and from the reviews I've seen online, it seems like an incredible read. Once I do read it, though, I'll make sure to do review on it for sure. To check out Jill's book, Spin the Sky, on Amazon, click here. To find out more about Jill, as well as her social media, head over to her website!
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Recently, I was published (again) in a literary magazine called Kaleo Journal! They've been so incredible to work with and it was an absolute pleasure to be featured in their third issue. If you want to check out my work (on page 20) along with many other talented artists, click here to be redirected to Kaleo's third issue! Kaleo Journal, as their website states, "is a collaborative magazine of many talented young people who are looking to make their impact on the world in a positive and expressive way, using their talents to create something amazing". Working with Kaleo has been amazing, and if you're a writer/poet looking for a literary magazine to submit your work to, I 100% recommend submitting to this one! They will take the time to work with you and make sure you like the format in which your piece is being published, and to me, that makes all the difference. Even now, they are continuing to follow up with me and have just been wonderful people to work with in general. To check out their submission guidelines, click here! It's pretty simple to submit and it's a really great way to start getting your work out there! Again, thank you to Kaleo for featuring my piece in their third issue. It means a whole lot to me! You can also purchase their third issue (as well as past issues) here. Hey everyone,
As you may know from reading on my blog, I am a contributor for an incredible lit mag, Ascend Magazine, and recently, they posted my poem "I Remember" on their blog/website! It's my first time ever being published to anything, so I'm pretty excited. If you wanna check it out (it's been edited from the poem that's up on my website now), click here! Also, there's still time to submit your poems to me via email for poem of the month for November! Submissions close October 30th, which is in 4 days! To check out submission guidelines, click here. My email is there as well. Best of luck to everyone who enters! Much love, Ashley Hey everyone,
Since we're basically halfway or more through the month of October, I figured now would be a good time to start getting submissions for the next Poem of the Month, which will be for November! If you want your poem to be featured on my website in the Poem of the Month section, as well as my twitter for the whole month, submit me a poem via email! I'll be choosing ONE person to be the winner out of however many submissions I get. I'm trying to do it a bit earlier this time so I'm able to get more submissions than last time, considering last time I sort of did it last minute. This is a great way for other poets/lit mags to see your work and possibly reach out to you for their own magazines! Submissions will close October 30th. Make sure to follow all the guidelines and instructions, which can be found under the Submit a Poem tab here. One poem per person. Best wishes, Ashley I was raped in July of 2015, and at first, I didn't even know it was rape. I had to go to therapy and tell my therapist what had happened, for her to actually tell me that what happened to me had been rape -- that I was raped. The thought never crossed my mind before that, but when I really thought about it, when she had said it, it finally clicked. What he did was rape, and once it clicked in my head, that was the end of it, of my emotional and mental stability.
I'm writing this blog post because lately, it's all I can think about. I can't stop thinking about what happened, and no matter what, I keep thinking that it's somehow my fault, even though deep down I know it isn't. It's weird how the thought somehow takes over you, and with me, out of nowhere. It's starting to take over my life. And when I confronted my rapist about it, he suddenly "didn't remember" what happened. He said, that if he did rape me (which he 100% did) that he's sorry and that me "accusing him" of rape is "crazy" and that this whole thing is crazy and that "don't you remember all the good times we had Ash? When you felt so low about yourself and I was the one who was there for you and made you feel special?" Unfortunately good times don't outweigh the bad, especially when it comes to rape. Oh, and another thing he said -- "If that's how it really went, you could've just stopped, pulled up your pants, and said no" Cute, right? Except I did. I did say stop. I did say no. And he just kept on going. So what now? What's your excuse now? I'm contemplating on whether or not I should report my rape to the police or not. I've heard good and bad things from doing it, and to be honest, I'm still scared to go through with it. But in the end, it's about justice and what I deserve. The thought of him waking up everyday without any consequences to his actions makes me sick. I don't want him to sit here and think he did nothing wrong when he did. I want justice. I want to feel empowered from doing the right thing. But I'm also extremely scared. I just don't know. And I don't even know where to start or where to go to. If you guys have any advice for me, please contact me in some way. Whether it be in the comments, or through my DMs on twitter. Just contact me if you know how to help in any way. I'm desperate for some guidance. Thank you. Ascend Magazine, an online lit mag by women of color for women of color, has just dropped their first ever issue on October 3rd 2016. The issue, which can be found here, consists of poetry, art, and interviews created by young talented woc from all over. According to Ascend's Editor-in-Chief, Malak Shahin, the goal of the magazine is "to establish a space where woman of color can come together and not be exploited or marginalized." The magazine is a safe space for woc everywhere to "tell our stories, share our art, and gain the experience that we're often not given the opportunity to do in mainstream media." Their first issue's theme is self-love, meaning the magazine's first issue centers around self-love as the main topic of choice. I thought this was an incredible theme to start off with, especially with their first issue. So many woc (including myself) have this self-hatred for themselves because of white supremacy. This issue alone teaches woc that it's okay to love ourselves with everything that we are, that we don't need to wish we were someone or something else, that beauty stems from just being ourselves -- and I think that's such an incredible message to send young women, especially women of color. Being a contributor for Ascend, I felt like I had to share this magazine with the world in any way I possibly could, which is why I decided to write a blog post about the magazine and what it means to be a part of something so beautiful. My teammates and other contributors have been so amazing to work with, and it's been so incredible working with other woc artists and writers that all want the same thing -- a safe space for other woc to share their thoughts, feelings, and ideas. As I said, I am a contributor for this magazine, so make sure to follow them on social media to stay up-to-date on new things coming your way! To check out Ascend's website, click here. To follow them on twitter, click here. 1. Dear Straight People by Denice Frohman "Dear Straight People, / You’re the reason we stay in the closet. / You’re the reason we even have a closet." 2. OCD by Neil Hilborn "But some mornings, I started kissing her goodbye but then she’d just leave because I was making her late for work." 3. Dear Ursula by Melissa May "Ursula, I don't want you cut down into bite-sized pieces / You weren't easy to swallow for a reason." 4. Rape Joke by Belissa Ecoloedo and Rhiannon McGavin "Consent is sexy? Lingerie is sexy. Consent is a basic human right." 5. Fantastic Breasts and Where to Find Them by Brenna Twohy "The first time a man I loved held me by the wrists and called me a whore, I did not think ‘run’, I thought ‘this is just like the movies’." Disclaimer: All credits to video goes to Button Poetry.
Between last night and this morning, I was doing some research on poets who used imagery within their writing, as well as poets who wrote in prose. And in my findings, I discovered someone who I am just falling more and more in love with by the second -- Marla Miniano, who, according to her website, writes poetry, edits, and produces books for a living. In the past few months, I've been starting to really like prose poems for some reason. Maybe it's the image I get from them, or maybe the word choice some poets tend to use that makes the piece flow so beautifully like she does. All I know is that what Marla Miniano writes, I love. And I want to end up writing beautiful pieces just like that. One piece she wrote in particular hit pretty close to home (it's called Heroine and it's also featured on her website) because of the fact that it's written about domestic abuse. As you may know from my post on Speak, I am a survivor of rape, which is a form of domestic abuse. And even though she doesn't talk about rape in particular in this poem, it still hits you that this (domestic abuse) is a real thing that so many people today go through. The fact that was able to connect with her piece immediately made me love her and her work even more. I highly suggest you all check her out. She writes in a way that captures the reader's attention and uses words that are so beautifully crafted. Click here to visit her website. Do you have a favorite poet? Let me know in the comments below! I'm always trying to find new poets to read because, honestly, I don't read much of older poets. As you may or may not know, I suffer from both anxiety and depression. I was diagnosed with depression first when I was seventeen, then with anxiety when I was eighteen, and after being diagnosed with depression, I just stopped writing. It was as if all the creativity got sucked out of me through an unknown vortex I couldn't escape. Same goes for reading, too. I didn't read, didn't write, didn't do anything I really loved anymore. It was horrible. I couldn't imagine something so terrible could ever happen to me, but it did, and I had absolutely no way to let my feelings out because I had just... stopped writing. Everything I tried to write turned out shitty, so I crumpled it into paper balls and threw them into the trashcan, promising myself I would never write a single word again. However, this turned out to not be true, and recently, I have brought myself out of that "coma" with a little bit of dedication, hard work, and persistence.
1. Write every day. I get it -- when you have depression and anxiety, writing just doesn't seem fun anymore. Instead it just feels like a chore, something you have to do. And why do it when it's not fun? So I didn't. But then I started going to therapy and my therapist told me to try writing a little bit every day, even if what I ended up writing sucked, so I figured, hey, why not give it a shot. I tried writing a little each day, not even poems, just whatever came to mind, and even doing just that made all the difference. Instead of doing absolutely nothing, I found that I was finally doing something, which made me feel better about myself. Not only that, but I was actually getting ideas for poems with some of the words and phrases I was writing down. Simple words turned into poetry, and sooner rather than later, I was writing again. Try giving yourself a limit (maybe 200 words a day, or writing for 10 minutes a day) and see what you come up with. You may end up surprising yourself. 2. Celebrate the little things. If you end up writing, let's say, a haiku -- that's something more than you were doing before, which was nothing. That's something you should be proud of. Congratulate yourself! Even the little things matter. Soon that haiku will turn into something beautiful, like maybe even a sonnet or a prose poem! No matter what, just know that small steps lead to bigger and brighter things. 3. When writing, channel your inner emotions. I stick by this step all the time! I think it's one of the best ways to gain inspiration, actually. If you feel sad, write about it. Feel it, drown in it, turn that feeling into something beautiful you can write about and spill onto paper. Turn what you feel into art, make it great. If you feel happy, write about it. If you're in love, write about it. Whatever emotions you may feel, write about them. You'll come to find that your best poems will come from emotions you feel the deepest. 4. Don't beat yourself up. Even if you haven't written in over a year, don't beat yourself up over it. There's nothing you can do to get that year back, so there's no point in crying about it now. The best thing to do is get up and start writing now, when you can. Find inspiration wherever you go. Look up writing prompts online. Change your scenery. Channel your emotions. Think deeply about issues going on in the world. All of this will help you write incredible poetry. You may even want to take a creative writing class (I know that's helped me tremendously). 5. It's okay to get off the internet for a while. Social media breaks are always necessary. Even though they may be hard, it can be extremely beneficial. Try taking a break from social media for a while (If you don't think you can get away with doing a whole week, try 3 days at first, then if you survive those, push it to 5, then 7). Social media seems to cloud our heads a little bit and seems to suck us in without even realizing it. You'll find that taking a break is much needed, even without you realizing it. Banned Books Week starts on September 25th and lasts till October 1st. The purpose of Banned Books Week is to read books that have been "banned" in order to have the freedom to read, and to (in some cases) raise awareness on these so called "challenged" topics. This year, I have decided to reread Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson (for what feels like the 100th time) and discuss why exactly it's so important that this book be read in schools. First off, the book was banned because it is considered to be "pornographic" because of a rape scene. This book was written in the voice of Melinda Sordino, a 14-year-old student attending Merryweather High, who was raped by a student at a party. Because of her being raped, Melinda doesn't speak. While the book does center around rape, it is extremely important that this topic be brought up in schools because it is important for rape survivors and victims of sexual abuse to know that they are not alone. At the end of the novel (spoilers ahead), Melinda realizes that in order for her to move past her rape, she must talk about it, which is exactly what Anderson is saying victims should do as well. It's important to speak up about sexual abuse because if we don't speak up about it, who will? If victims don't speak up about their own experiences, how will they ever find closure? The book itself is so much more than just rape -- it's about the importance of speaking up, about finding your voice and doing something great with it, it's about those that have been victims of sexual abuse realize that no matter what, they are not alone. Readers are able to connect with Melinda, and because of this, have gotten the courage to speak up and get the help the deserve. Even to those who weren't raped/sexually abused, you can still find a piece of yourself in the main character and that's what's so incredible about this book. It's understandable why this book was banned from being read in schools (because of topics of rape, sexual abuse, drugs, family dysfunction, etc.), but at the same time, these are real things going on in teenagers lives today that need to be brought to peoples' attention. This isn't something you can just cover up and hide, this is something that needs to be discussed in schools so we're able to prevent things like this from happening to those we love most and give those that have already gone through this the courage to speak up. I think this book is an incredible choice to read, especially for Banned Books Week. Don't just read it -- raise awareness on the topics brought up in this book. Bring awareness to rape and sexual abuse and drugs and family issues. Let sexual abuse survivors know that we're not alone in all of this. Set a comfortable environment for us to speak up about what's happened to us. Don't judge us. Don't question us -- believe us. Take what we say seriously because it is serious. Be there to comfort us. That's all we ask. I wanna know what you're reading for Banned Books Week! Comment below and let me know! Much love, Ashley |
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